Worzel Week – Day 4

All this week we'll be posting extracts from our fabumazing book, The quite very actual adventures of Worzel Wooface. In this instalment, there's the pitter-patter of tiny kitten feet ...

May 20

Mum didn’t go to bed last night because Stray did do giving birth to her kittens, and Mum did hobserving and very Being There in case everyfing wented pear-shaped. It all started at one in the morning, and I was not allowed to join in. I did get to do sleeping with Dad on the bed, and also

I-don’t-care-what-he-does-you-just-make-sure-he-is-quiet-and-doesn’t-get-out. I was very actual exerlent at this, and did not know about the giving birth fing until this morning.

There are five kittens, and Mum says they is all alive and about the same size. Mum says that is good news because there isn’t one she has to worry and flap about. Dad says that just means she’ll worry and flap about all five of them. There are two tabby ones and three black ones. I did walk past the bedroom this morning and my appearance did not cause chaos or ninja-hissy-fits from Stray, so I are not going to be banned from upstairs for the next two months which I is very quite relieved about.

This evening Mum was supposed to go to the theatre to see her friend, Louise, In A Musical. A Musical is when people do manic jumping up and down and dancing and singing, so I is not actual surprised Louise was inned it: Louise’s life is a permanent musical but with more mud. Just before she was going to leave, Mum wented to check on the kittens and Stray, and she fort she could see and feel somefing hard and kitten shaped inside the mummy cat. Mum did have a big panic and phoned

Sally-the-Vet, who said Stray and the five kittens needed to come to the Hotel de Stoven Hall straight away.

Sally-the-Vet said there was no more kittens. Mum had to miss going to the theatre, of course, and I fink Sally-the-Vet did feel a bit sorry about this because, when Mum got out her purse to pay, Sally-the-Vet did tell her to go home and get some sleep, and not be worrying about the monies. Mum was feeling like a bit of a wally for panicking, and even more so an hour later, when Stray did the biggest poo you have ever seen come out of a cat!

So far Mum has been called a prat, a wally, a hidiot and a numpty. Mainly by herself.

The quite very actual adventures of Worzel Wooface is available now over at the H&H website.

View an interview with the author, Cath Pickles, on our YouTube channel!